Tech-Enabled Abuse
Many of us now use technology as a primary method of social interaction - through social media, video calling, or dating apps - and it is important to know what digital abuse is, what it can look like, and how to support yourself or someone who has experienced it.
Digital abuse, also known as tech-enabled abuse, has existed since the inception of technology. Now as we all grow more dependent upon it and with COVID-19 as part of our reality, there is an unsurprising increase of its frequency. The National Domestic Violence Hotline defines digital abuse as “the use of technology such as texting and social networking to bully, harass, stalk or intimidate a partner.” It also cited that during the first six months of 2020, 19% of calls were related to digital abuse. EndTAB, an organization that centers their work on prevention efforts for digital abuse, also reports that 1 in 12 people are victims of nonconsenual pornography, otherwise known as revenge porn, and that 59% of teens have experienced some form of cyberbullying.
When thinking about digital abuse, it is helpful to consider the following question: “how can this form of technology, like an app, location tracker, etc. be misused to maintain power and control over someone?” There are various ways to maintain power and control over another person using technology through harassment, threats, humiliation, spreading rumors, impersonation, intimidation and location tracking. This can include behaviors or actions such as accessing accounts and devices without permission as a means to monitor communication, finances, or a person’s physical location. This type of abuse can also take the form of having intimate photos or recordings taken without a person’s knowledge, or manipulating someone to have their photo taken or image recorded. It is important to remember that consent is free from coercion, duress and force; anything that involves those is not consent. In the event that a person tries to leave the relationship, the person doing harm may threaten to reveal information or non consensual photos to the survivor’s family, friends or coworkers. In LGBTQ relationships, this increases the level of danger if the person is not out to the people in their life.
According to Adam Dodge, founder of EndTAB, a majority of people doing harm are not cyber experts, but instead are tech savvy and have exploited an opportunity due to their personal connection with the survivor. For those who have romantic significant others, whether living with them or not, it is natural to want to share personal information with them - there is nothing wrong in wanting or doing this. Instead, it is important to be able to recognize digital abuse as well as ways to address it. Healthy human connection is an important component for many people and it still can be done safely within a virtual space.
Digital abuse is just as harmful as any other form of abuse and must be treated as such. Raising awareness and offering resources to survivors is imperative in supporting them on their healing journeys and helping to eliminate violence in our communities.
Being able to recognize digital abuse is a crucial starting point to prevention, but it is just as important to know how to offer support when someone expresses need. A person does not need to be a tech expert in order to support someone who has experienced digital abuse. Below is a non-exhaustive list of best practices to offer when supporting either yourself or someone you may know.
DEMYSTIFY
Define what digital abuse is and provide examples of what it can look like. Explain that the person who harmed took advantage of an opportunity and manipulated access.
NORMALIZE
Help them understand they did not do anything wrong. Intimate partners tend to share devices, account passwords and other personal info and it is not their fault.
BE COMPASSIONATE AND SUPPORTIVE
Many people may not understand the long term effects of cyberstalking or tech abuse. Over time, these acts start to scrape away one’s trust in others, accessing social media or even browsing the internet, becoming hyper vigilant. Digital abuse can be a drawn out process and can be painful and tiring for survivors which can negatively affect a person’s work or school, personal relationships, eating and sleeping habits, etc. Be understanding of a person’s experience by actively listening and helping to connect them to resources.
DEFINE DIGITAL SAFETY
Help them define what safety means by reflecting on these three questions:
Do I have access to technology FREELY without any consequences?
Do I have full control over my devices, accounts and/or apps?
Am I able to exist online without limitation or fear?
Answering no to any of these questions may mean that someone is not digitally safe and may want to explore more preventative measures for safety planning.
Create a Digital Safety Plan
A digital safety can plan can involve any of the following:
Changing usernames and passwords regularly
Being mindful of who has access to specific accounts and devices
Using a “safer” device, like a friends phone or library computer
Learning more about the types of harm or abuse being experienced
Looking for patterns that can help narrow down the potential source of technology being used to monitor a survivor
Documenting the incidents (taking screenshots or creating a log with details about the harm)
Checking the device settings to confirm which email account is used for backup or if any other accounts are linked
Considering hidden devices or cameras that may have been given as gifts
Having a back-up plan in case someone’s access to a device or account was taken away and the situation escalates. Since certain acts can be considered a crime, you can file a police report and provide your documentation as proof
Trusting your instincts
Other digital safety tips and resources
haveibeenpwned.com Will alert of a data breach, including accounts and passwords that need to be changed and/or updated
fastpeoplesearch.com Shows how much of an individual’s personal info is available online
FING app Shows all devices logged into a person’s wifi network and offers the ability to remove unwanted devices
National Network to End Domestic Violence: Technology Safety
Teresa Mejia is Peace Over Violence’s Campus Sexual Violence Advocate and Case Manager for the California Institute of Technology (Caltech). Teresa works in collaboration with Caltech’s Equity and Title IX Office to offer free and confidential services to students, faculty and staff surrounding issues of sexual assault, sexual harassment, intimate partner violence and stalking. Teresa’s role is to provide and assist with the coordination of comprehensive case management and emergency response services to survivors of sexual and intimate partner violence as well as education and awareness programs for the Caltech community.